Feeling Crappy and Crabby

It’s day three on my journey into diet-land, and I’m feeling kinda crappy today…which in turn is making me feel pretty crabby.

I’m peeing every 10 minutes, which gets old. My body is also…getting rid of toxins in the only way it knows how, to put it delicately. I’m shaky, I’m cold, and…I’m about to have to get up and pee again.

(and back.)

On top of that, my throat is feeling scratchy, and I’m praying that I’m not about to get sick.

But, I’m here still, hanging on. Three 32oz servings of water already ingested, and it’s lunch time. I’m not having hardly anything, but that’s ok. I’m not really hungry today, just have that light-headed feeling as my body tries to figure out where all that nice sugary and fried food has gone to.

I really don’t want to be at work, I want to be in bed. I’m like a drug addict coming down and crashing. I know that I’m a bonafide sugar addict, and I’ve spent the last year feeding that addiction and letting it control me…and now that I’ve stopped cold turkey my body is NOT happy with me. Either that or it’s very happy and has a wicked way of showing it. I’m shaky, irritable, freezing (which is very strange, I’ve been running very HOT after being pregnant and having Rea…) and tired. I just want to sleep, and at night I am not sleeping well.

Ugh, I just want this first phase to be OVER! ><

I was catching up today on a blog that I always enjoyed reading back when I was in my weight loss hay day. It stars Mary, and she is honestly one of my biggest inspirations, if for no other reason than the fact that she is open, honest, and candid with her struggles. In one of her posts she talked about the “journey” of weight loss, and other things that life is tossing at her. You hear that so often, almost romanticizing the experience…but her her words resonated with me today.

When I get ahead of myself, I obsess and start to stumble – I do best when I focus on one day at a time. I’m forced to think about the word journey itself, which has French origins. It comes from a medieval word meaning how far you could go in one day. In modern French, there are two ways to say the word day – un jour and une journée. The former is more of a unit, whereas the latter has a subtle nuance that implies duration of time. For example, when saying goodbye to someone, you can say Bonne journée, which is sort of like, hey, enjoy the rest of your day.

It’s Day Three, and I think it’s gonna be my hardest. I’m hoping by tomorrow my body will calm down and start to realize that there is plenty of fat left on me and start eating it instead of screaming at me to eat more of it. My mind is a different story of course, but once my body starts to comply I am thinking that will help.

One day at a time…going to go pee now…

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1 Comment

Filed under mental, rant, sugar addict!

One response to “Feeling Crappy and Crabby

  1. The first few days are always SO hard! Day 1 is easy – all the motivation is still there, and you’re riding high on the adrenaline of your goal. But after a couple of days, you remember how hard it all is! Stick with it – you know the hard work is worth it. And definitely, definitely focus on just one day at a time!

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