It’s about 8pm when I make it out to the park. I’m definitely a night exerciser. I’ve tried to get up early to exercise many times over the years. I’ve finally decided that there’s nothing wrong with being a night exerciser…if my alternative is to not exercise because I end up sleeping in, then it’s gotta be great, right? It’s great for me. Especially now with my husband away at school – there’s no one that I have to come home to (brother is usually out with friends or on dates, so all good there), no kids yet. Might as well make the best of these evenings alone.
I start in on the jog. I always hate calling my running a jog, because it’s more of an 80-year-old man shuffle. People could probably walk faster than I “jog,” but it’s getting faster these days, and I’m excited about that.
First thing I notice is I’m getting a cramp in my side tonight. Tonight I’ve switched to shorts, and I’m sure that anyone with thighs that touch realize what happens when you run with wind shorts on right? They creep right on up your inner thighs until you’re left wearing a diaper. So, me being the ever-planner, I’m wearing bike shorts underneath my wind shorts. Where am I going with this? The wind shorts, though almost too big and have to have the sting drawn up, are coupled with bike shorts that may be just a bit too tight. They are causing this weird cramp at my waistline. I think about new shorts, then remember that Brad and I are broke, so I guess my only option is to lose weight to fit into them. I decide to keep jogging, pain is for wussies, anyway.
Thinking about the shorts, I realize I’ve gone about a quarter mile or so. I keep jogging.
I’m looking at all the people out at the park tonight. A group of 4 girls, taking their time on a stroll, none that I would say “needed” to be out exercising on a Friday night, but their all decked out in their walking gear and giggling and texting. I miss my walking friends – Christi, you and I need to go on a walk soon woman…when I’m in Abilene, because that’s where you are. 😦
A mother and a child – the daughter is probably between 10 and 12 years old…both are pudgy. G0d, that was me as a child. She’s even wearing one of those horrible outfits for big kids – the t-shirt with the ruffle around the waist, coupled with the tight capri pants. Because that ruffle just hides so much. Both mom and daughter need to be here – I hope that this isn’t a one-time event for them. I pray as much for the daughter at least. Too young to have to worry about this. I recall exercising at her age…watching videos with beautiful women doing these insane exercises that they made look so easy. There’s nothing worse than being 12 years old and wondering why you’re fat…and feeling horrible because you can’t keep up with these gorgeous blonde women in their shorts and sports bras. I jog quickly towards and away from them. I am happy to leave my past behind me, for now.
The couple with a baby in a stroller. I won’t pretend that seeing that doesn’t resonate with some sad twinge deep inside me. I was obsessed with babies and having them for about 3 years. I still want to get preggo (very much!), but I’m not letting it rule my heart these days. Still, I have to take a minute to dream and hope that that’s Brad and me someday.
The middle aged couple…I’m kind of starring at this point because it’s dark and I’m trying to see…is the guy wearing a pair of slacks? With a belt? To the park? I think he…oh my, he just reached right on down to adjust his junk. Wow, looking away now…
As I jog past them, I might add.
Another group of girls. This one is not like the first…the three girls are much heavier, and not as lively. They don’t giggle, they talk quietly. The are walking. I wish I could pat them on the shoulder and tell them that if my 230-something frame can do it, they can too.
I don’t, but I try to smile as I jog toward them.
At this point, something awesome happens. Maybe I should say awe inspiring. Because it’s not like a “high five, awesome!” moment, but something that hits me, and fills me with a bit of awe. Semantics, but just wanted to be clear.
I realize that I’ve been spending all this time noticing others at the park, instead of focusing on the fact that I might die because I can’t breathe and my legs hurt and I’ve got a freaking stitch in my side. The stitch, by the way has moved from my left to my right side, which is kinda weird.
I’ve jogged a mile and a half.
I’ve jogged a mile and a half before…but usually by this time I’m cursing people and having to convince myself that I’m not dying.
Of course suddenly I felt like I was dying and had to convince myself otherwise to finish out the jog. 😉
For the first time on this night, I think for a few minutes I felt like a runner…or a jogger…more like a shuffler, but who cares. It felt great.
Just had to share.
I also wanted to share about a post on my friend Christi‘s blog – she’s a beautiful, wonderful mom, who has had the terrific opportunity to run a review blog. This weekend she’s reviewing a gorgeous necklace and giving one away, and I wants it! So, I’m going to share about it here, because I’m selfish and sharing about it here gives me 3 freaking extra entries! So go look at it, but don’t enter, because then you’d be my competition.
Oh fine, enter if you must…but tell her I should get it anyway. 😛
Shameless plugs aside, I’m awake, it’s Saturday, lot’s of cleaning to do. I’m lucky to not have any distractions to take me off task diet/exercise wise this weekend. Don’t let your distractors get the better of you! Eat less, move more!